Mating Or Waiting?

Relationships Are Wildly Unpredictable. Especially This Day And Age. Dating Has Become A Literal Breeding Ground For Risk. It’s True, Finding And Subsequently Settling Down With A Partner Is An Age Old Gamble For Everyone Involved. But As We Enter A New Age , In A World Where Everyone's Chasing Short Term Excitement And Thrill, How Can We Even Begin To Feel ‘safe ‘ And Secure With A Partner? Have The Changing Realities Of The Modern World Taken Precedence Over Our Natural Instincts And Primal Needs? Are Men Still The Protectors, Providers And Rightful Leaders Or Are Women More Readily Embracing And Adapting To New Normals , Heading To Quicker Spiritual Ascension?

Amber Janae: Welcome to Abstract Audio, the podcast presenting life as an abstract art form. The show that encourages you to proceed beyond the tangible, to extract the infinite from the finite, to see with the mind what you cannot physically see with the eyes. Oh, this? It's an emancipation. It's an exploration into areas usually overlooked. Explore with me on today's episode.

So, as you know, we're here on the third and final installment of our survival series. Not to say we won't be talking about it ever again, since it's such a multifaceted topic, but Me thinks we're going to wrap it up with this one. But trust, we're sending it off with a bang. Literally. So if you recall last time we were speaking on how the idea of danger and safety isn't quite what we think it is, specifically when it comes to how the landscape of collective consciousness is currently shifting. We went on to note how that results in so many people living in fear nowadays, being forced to tap into those survival instincts in accordance with the lower vibrations that fear creates, as well as the level of consciousness and presentness that's required to get out of that space. And as usual, that got me thinking. With so many people out here just living to survive, living in a space of constant fear and self preservation, how can we be expected to truly feel safe with a partner? With someone else? I mean, at the end of the day, that's what we're here to do on a biological level, right? Partner up, mate, preserve the species. But how can that happen when, as we just touched upon in the last episode, everything we do has an aspect of risk and danger to it? Especially if we're putting ourselves out there in that way, going out on that limb with someone, entrusting the entirety of our beings to them. Sure, we crave danger and thrill to an extent, and yeah, that can translate to the thrill of the chase. But even once you get the person you want, the endorphins are still going in that honeymoon period. You know, that oxytocin, like we've mentioned previously, it's that reward center in your brain just going nuts. But once you settle in and are expected to feel safe and secure, that's where it gets tricky on a lot of levels for a lot of people, not only due to trauma and other external factors, but also because it can be so difficult to separate those stages and identify what we truly want. We crave danger and thrill, but seek stability and safety in relationships. Like how that work? To me, that map ain't mapping. And call me childish, but on this topic, I instantly got to thinking about that scene in The Lion King. You know that scene? Yeah, I'm no singer, but, you know, the one that's where my brain went. Because I want us all to feel the love. This episode, y'all. Yeah, I'm childish, I know, but to me, it makes sense. The shit tracks. Because how can we talk the survival of our species without talking about the most innate primal instinct of all to procreate, to couple up, to get it on, to reproduce? So let's talk about sex, baby. But not just that. Let's talk about whether our instincts and intuitions support or undermine our wants and needs in the shifting societal terrains of today. And we couldn't possibly speak on both sides of this topic without both sexes present. Plus, I'm single, jaded and contemplating cat ownership, so I figured it might be best not to tackle this alone. So here with us today is our guest. He's an author, artist, and entrepreneur. He goes by the name of Peace Supreme. He's going to share some of his thoughts with us today. Welcome to the show. How are you doing?

Peace Supreme: Peace. Peace Queen. Yo. Thank you. A thousand salutations. I appreciate you for inviting me on the show tonight.

Amber Janae: No problem. Thank you so much for joining the pod. Hopefully you can be the voice of reason here because I'd be feeling crazy talking to myself half the time.

Peace Supreme: I understand. Yeah.

Amber Janae: And speaking of crazy, I don't want no messiness. I don't want this to turn into a battle of the sexes, battle royale kind of deal. Okay. Maybe it can get a little messy. A little mess never hurt anyone. Right?

Peace Supreme: Right.

Amber Janae: So be real. You know the topic. Let's set the tone. Are you single? Dating? We need to know how you come in.

Peace Supreme: And be honest with you, Quaint, I'm just so focused right now. It's easy to get caught up trying to lock something down or trying to pursue the next thrill. Yeah, me personally, though, is I'm open. I ain't pursuing. I'm so focused on my business and the work that I do.

Amber Janae: I can respect that. A hard working black man. Now be honest. When you are with someone, do you like a little mess, a little risk, a little thrill in your relationship, or are you strictly healed and vibrating so high that no negativity can touch you?

Peace Supreme: Absolutely. Yeah, you got to have that. You got to have a little spice in there. If you find somebody that resonates with you, it don't have to be perfect. And I think a lot of us make the mistake of trying to seek perfection in others. Right. Anything outside of ourselves, we try to seek perfection and we often overlook the process. Perfecting or correcting ourselves, we set these expectations. It always inevitably lead to the conflict and strife.

Amber Janae: Exactly. And I like that you recognize that, because I hate when people get all holier than thou on this subject and try to downplay that strife, that struggle. Like, oh, I don't do drama. I don't put up with that when it comes to my man or when it comes to my woman. Like, I call bullshit on that most times because one, black people are the creators of struggle, love. And two, if you listen to the last episode, it's a scientific fact that we're all naturally drawn to a little friction, to a little excitement, a little danger. We're hardwired to get a rise out of it. Females even more so than males, in my opinion.

Peace Supreme: Yeah, that's true in a sense. Sometimes you got to mix it up sometimes start an argument, break the routine. It gets boring, gets predictable. That's the thing about female nature, is you guys hate predictability. I've been in a situation like that before where in the past I try to do everything straight and narrow, just work, spend time, go out and do different things. And after a while I kept wondering, like, damn, why is it things as good, I'm doing everything right, and she's just starting arguments or just always picking nitpicking, finding something wrong. And then I had to realize that I'm too cut and narrow, I'm too straight with it. But it wasn't until I started, fuck this shit, I'm going to do me, I'm going to do my thing. I hate to say it, but it's true.

Amber Janae: They always say men seek out and naturally enjoy that danger or the thrill of the chase. Women, we like to be chased, but we also always go for the bad boys, right? The niggas that ain't no good for us. We unintentionally or subconsciously even end up chasing a little bit too, in doing so, right? Yeah. Like there's even some science behind that, too. We see that dark, mysterious, standoffish behavior you were describing as hypermasculine and associate that with better quality genes and then go for that on an evolutionary level when even on a rational basis, we know that this guy isn't the best choice in the long run. It just seems to me that there's a disconnect with what we truly want and what we think we want. There's our societal wants and needs, and then there's our biological wants and needs.

Peace Supreme: In regards to the biology, addressing the urges that we gravitate towards versus the societal idea, what we are supposed to be attracted to and pursue. A lot of that shit is cookie cut. A lot of it is Disney. It's not based in reality. It's not based in evolution.

Amber Janae: You're right. For example, biologically monogamy isn't even feasible on that level. It makes more sense typically for males to procreate as much as possible to preserve their legacy and preserve the species. I hate touching on celebrities because it's not that kind of pod, but we have the nick cannons, the futures of the world out there, and they're looked down upon for doing so. But it's true. No matter the way they go about it. Those are two strong black men who have built solid tribes and solid support systems, have strengthened their legacies, and are actively taking care of these children. Even the women in the situation had to put their ego and pride aside to coexist. And that's kind of beautiful to me. I don't know if it's necessarily for me, but I like to keep an open mind.

Peace Supreme: And, you know, that's a positive way to look at it too. I like the way you look at it. I know when I look at social media, other people's opinions on it, they seem to have a negative way of looking at it. Like, oh, man, here they go again. They just popping babies out. Especially with the way the world is with all the abortions and all this that going on. So it's like, I can respect I mean, they get money, they taking care of theirs. They doing what they need to do.

Amber Janae: While we're on the topic of numerous children, I wanted to note that personally. I found as I grow that the traditional milestones like marriage and more children, the things I thought were important to me were actually more so important to society less about what I wanted and more about what I was conditioned to want. Can you relate?

Peace Supreme: I bumped my head quite a few times along the way in the pursuit of a happiness that I thought was wanted.

Amber Janae: Exactly.

Amber Janae: And I think many people do the same. Like, even finding my personal path to happiness was hard is hard because I'm still on it. But don't get me wrong, I still need that thrill, that rush. I still need a little toxicity in my relationships for them to work. But I think at this point in my life, I more so value the openness and honesty over that thrill. And it really comes down to what you value more. But my thing is, why should we have to choose? Why choose between what's safe and socially acceptable and what we truly crave? Why fight what we inherently want? We want thrill. We want fun. We want adventure. We should be able to find that happiness in any way that suits us and at that, say, polygamy for some people. More power to you. Hell, we've been talking about Wild Instincts for three episodes. And even in the animal kingdom, a large fraction of mammals are polygamous.

Peace Supreme: That is true.

Amber Janae: And of course, it's not an actual jungle out here, but we're living in such a toxic time, and I hate even using the word toxic because it's so overused. But the question becomes, in the search of happiness, are we more so addicted to the chase, to the thrill than we are the actual act of settling down?

Peace Supreme: Yeah, I don't see nobody trying to settle down. At the end of the day, it's all game. Both sides don't like the casualties they face when they play that game. But men have always lived and did what they did. And females have always responded and did the things that they did as far as infidelity as far as betrayals or monkey branching and controlling, like how husband used control they wives. And fast forward to today with the sexual freedom that everyone has. The fact that it's not as big of a stigma placed on gender roles or just male female dynamics in general, although the implications, as we've seen, very serious. But now it's like a candy factory. Exactly. Nobody trying to settle down. People are too stressed out to the point where sex, right along with drug use and alcohol, is just another means to escape from their own misery. All in all is a detriment because once again, this is us seeking outside of ourselves. We're seeking perfection. We're seeking the idea of heaven. We're seeking an everlasting which is not. And as much as we try to grasp towards freedom, that very act or those particular acts places you in circumstances which takes your freedom. You become a slave to your own desires and your passions and your whims.

Amber Janae: And I love that you're speaking to that, especially as it pertains to black men and black women, because there is an imbalance in the culture between males and females right now that, of course, has less to do with the things we've done and everything to do with what has been done to us. I feel in this country, systemic imprisonment, the war on drugs, the feminization of the black man, the exchange we as black women were forced to make between our men and say, public assistance, even. It's a war on black families. It's a war on black people. And that's why I really hate hearing, oh, black women are the least protected group, because, as you know, during slavery, even black women were told and shown that our men couldn't protect us. And we're still reeling from the backlash, in my opinion. I hate to always bring shit back to race, but so much of it really does come back to race. Like, with the idea of safety comes the idea of security, protection. And we've been conditioned to believe that black men can no longer protect black women or that they simply don't want to. But what's your take on that?

Peace Supreme: Men? We grow up with the idea that we need to protect and provide and treat our women like angels and princesses and queens and just move like that. It's interesting you mentioned that too, because one thing that I don't hear discussed too often is the generational impact. Right. Usually in the discussions, one counter to that would be, oh, such and such happened long ago or back in the day, get over and move on situation is a unique one in the sense that what we went through as a collective is something that no other race has gone through.

Amber Janae: Right.

Peace Supreme: And the implications of that my grandfather is alive to this day. He'll tell you when he was young, he used to pick cot. So that's just in the span of 70 years. So add centuries to that and consider the overall implications. It's nothing less than miraculous how even after going through all that, we still move and command the world. Through our ability, we influence the world.

Amber Janae: I agree. We as a people are so much more than what we've been through. And speaking of history, you kind of got to look back on what people have been doing in the past to combat these kind of issues. And the farther you look back, especially when it comes to our people, you find more instances of the art of polygamy, multiple wives in the tribe and all that. What's your take on that? Or even open relationships, if that suits your fancy?

Peace Supreme: Well, you know, desperate times call for desperate measures.

Amber Janae: Exactly.

Peace Supreme: There was things that we had to do to survive in slavery that was considered impractical or controversial. But shit, you got to do what you got to do, right?

Peace Supreme: A lot of it comes down to survival and adaptability. And I feel so many people are accepting of it nowadays because it seems like the safest option now in comparison to all the other bullshit going on out here. I think the people that get into them do so to feel more supported, more safe, more secure and more protected than in the standard relationship, rather than risking the failure of another monogamous one.

Peace Supreme: So there's different ways to go to look at this. Some people are better geared towards monogamy, some people more geared towards being in polygamous situations. You even have some men out there who, although I don't agree with it, but they prefer, they don't mind having brother husbands or being a part of that. And I don't judge anyone who pursue that. I certainly can't blame the woman for doing that because shit was better than one provider and protected than two or three or more. And it also shows that she commands a great level of power within herself. Brothers. We have to understand that there are women who are just naturally dominating in their energy.

Peace Supreme: Yes. And that's in both a spiritual and a historical sense, women so often throughout history were actually the matriarchs, the leaders. For thousands of years, many African societies were matriarchal. Even taking it a step further, some places in Indonesia, China, et cetera, adopted similar structures. And some say this shift in consciousness we're experiencing right now is also going to be supporting a rise of women in power. How do you think men will respond to this if it is the case?

Peace Supreme: Well, it's interesting. I actually enjoy talking about this as well. All this has done is pretty much raised the bar for men to actually step their game up and to do more to take on that role so that the women don't have to feel so much as the need to take over.

Peace Supreme: I agree and disagree because to a certain extent, I truly do believe women are meant to be led by men, but we can be leaders as well, just as easily. And also, I don't think women necessarily even have to be at the metaphorical helm to be running things behind. Every great man is a great woman. Every man can find his weakness and his strength in a woman. A divine masculine needs. Divine feminine and vice versa.

Peace Supreme: Exactly. Yeah. It's just the times. The divine feminine, the shift in the currents, they speak about that a lot in Hinduism. The rise of the Kali Yuga, the different ages. We went from an Age of Enlightenment to, like, a Golden Age to a Bronze Age. They say when Kali Yuga comes around, the women turn wild. And when you look at the depictions, when it comes to certain goddesses, those dark goddesses, they always be depicted with the tongue sticking out. And that's the symbolic imagery that we see today with a lot of the females, like Cardi B and Kim K. It's an archetype. People get caught up on the gossip and the trends, and just on a higher level, everything goes back to the spirit. There's a spiritual movement. The way the tides turn over millennias, we just so happen to be in a time where all the imagery, all the symbolism lies up. So just looking at the behavior of the women tells us the times that we in. And instead of attacking it, I get it there. As you know, some things can't be up. We're trying to take a negative and turn into a positive. We're trying to make the most out of the times that we're in and balance everything out.

Peace Supreme: You mentioned balance, and I feel like that's really important. But whenever they bring up women in the media or women in power, they like to say that we think and react too much with our emotions. Right. But I always wonder why no one says that about men thinking with their dicks. Is it not the equivalent? I mean, it is proven that women think more with our right brain and men more with the left, making you all more logical and us more intuitive and emotional. But that's not a bad thing to me. Rather than a patriarchy characterized by dominance and competition, would it be so terrible to switch to a focus on nurturing and cooperation that's balance, that's fair, and that's what women bring to the table. And in my opinion, that's what we need right now, a focus on high vibrational energy and emotion, such as love. Love, joy, peace, acceptance. These are all high vibrational emotions that will be supported as we navigate this shift to a higher consciousness. Now, if we ignore this shift, you see the direction things are headed in. Look at the signs today. The overturning of Roe versus Wade, for example, which affects every woman. But even more so women of color. About 40% of women who get abortions in the US. Are black. Even though our historic lack of proper health care is certainly nothing new. But look around. All you see is men's need to control. A man's prerogative to conquer creates nothing but low vibrations and more fear. Men were never the original leaders. Women were. Men are to enforce the laws. We create them. We bring things back into balance after destruction has come.

Peace Supreme: Yeah, that goes to the structure, the masculine aspect. It's that same structure that holds the family together, that holds society together. Society as a whole can't expand without some boundary, some constrictions. You was talking about the divine feminine and the nurturing aspect. Historically, women have been forced into roles that went against their femininity. So over time, they naturally regressed. And it's like, you guys forgot what it's like to tap into the femininity.

Amber Janae: I wouldn't say regressed. I would say we adapted.

Peace Supreme: That's actually really interesting that you say that, because now that you mentioned it, we recognize those who think from a higher level, think from a higher perspective. We understand that in the beginning was like the primordial waters, which is the goddess Newt. And it's these primordial waters which creation comes out of. And there's great wisdom to be gained when we're able to tap into those waters. The womb of eternity. And that's why women were the oracles. We would seek out the womb to understand what's going on behind the veil of this perceived reality. Instead of like, yeah, we could deduce logically and with reason to get from point A to point B. But it's something about utilizing intuition to help us get more in touch with the subconscious mind. I know in psychoanalysis, Car Yoon talks about the collective unconscious. Subconscious. Yes. Fascinating that the highest form of intelligence has nothing to do with logic or reasoning. And the fact that females, women in general, wired to function off of intuitions, emotions because it's a primal intelligence.

Peace Supreme: Right.

Peace Supreme: It's pre intellect, which deals directly with reality itself. See, logic deduced from forms that's already been altered, like ideas. The perception of things is governed by logic. But we could reason like we got whole philosophies that contend with each other because it's just reference points. It only orbits around the truth.

Peace Supreme: And even if you're not super into psychology, we recognize there's Mother Earth. Many believe God is a woman or takes on a female form. I do believe the matriarchy will rise again in its time. Of course, time is an illusion. But the real illusion is to think this whole system will not change. This Age of Aquarius is about going back to the origins, going back to the laws of nature. People won't be allowed to live in their self limiting beliefs for much longer. And I believe all will be revealed in divine timing. Do you agree?

Peace Supreme: Yeah. Everybody has their season too. Everybody has to go through a quickening and awakening or an initiation in their own sense, all of which ultimately culminates to knowledge of self.

Peace Supreme: Right?

Peace Supreme: It's definitely going to take us both it's going to take both the feminine and the masculine. It's just the masculine has to step up even further into the divine masculine, which is always love, is always peace, because fear is while in some cases is necessary. But it was never meant to be our master. We let fear for too long become our master in the place of truth, in the place of righteousness, in the place of love and unity.

You're right, we can't stay in that place of fear for too long. And in my opinion, there is no safe. There is no safety. There just is. The only true safety you can achieve is inside yourself. It's within. You can feel content inside. But if you ask me, it's impossible to feel safe outside looking outwardly for stability because there is that danger and uncertainty in everything, especially relationships. But thank you so much for sitting in with us today, King, and being so authentic and open and honest and real. It was a pleasure having you. Is there anything you want to leave the listeners with? Any final thoughts?

Peace Supreme: Connect back to your center, connect back to source. And that's your intent. And give birth to the world that is needed. Everybody keep elevating, stay true to yourself, stay true to your path. But most importantly, continue to tune in and support this amazing woman and what she do. Love the work you do. You came a long way. I'm proud of you. I'm proud to be here. I'm proud to be a part of this movement, this show. It was a pleasure to be here. Y'all could tap in with me at @Kingsati. KX N-G-S-A-V-D-I as my insta.